Perfect Reflections

This post is for Debbie Roth’s   #forgivingconnects and my #healingwordsmon and it’s about non-judgement.  Today’s poem is an extract from Perfect Reflections (which will appear in my new book).

Show me Your light
In the evil deeds of men
For dost not evil
Merely cover the good in them?
Show me Your light
In hurtful, vengeful words
For dost not pain
Merely cover forgotten love?
Give me the strength, Lord,
To proclaim what is true:
That we are all
Perfect Reflections of You.

– taken from the poem Perfect Reflections by Anita Neilson.

I have to say right up that I have been very judgemental in life.  This all began with a childhood habit which grew into an ugly spiritual boil before bursting a few years ago.  Only then, could I see my behaviour for what it was – embedded in fear.  Fear of difference.  But ironically, now I realise that every person we come across is different, unique, and to surround myself in this bubble of fear was only hurting myself.   And yet, I choose not to beat myself up over this.  I forgive myself for my years of judging on appearances; of laughing at those less pretty or clever than I; of being a little too spoilt for my own good.

Now that’s not to say I don’t struggle with showing love to those who commit acts of evil in the misguided belief that it will bring them the happiness they seek.  But they are on their own journey through many lifetimes, just as we are on ours.  We’re all at different stages, and who am I to say that my way is the right way?  I know that there will be others who compare themselves favourably with my ‘misguided’ standards.  It’s such a tricky one this.  Yes, show love and understanding to people who do bad things but also speak out if others are being harmed.  I’d value your thoughts on this dilemma, because I do battle with this.  Anita.

8 thoughts

  1. My judgement on others has always been based on my fear and judgement on myself. Once I started working on self love and acceptance for myself as a daily practice, I really felt this shift in my energy and noticed it wasn’t happening for others either. Great post Anita 🌈


    • That’s really helpful. I’ve been doing a lot of work on myself but I didn’t know how to shift this one. It’s such a huge block for me. Must be karmically brought forward for me to work on.


      • Yes often we carry this judgement on from our ancestors like an emotional imprint in our DNA and some of the work I do is energetically giving back. You can sit quietly outside, take some deep breaths and say to your ancestors. “I no longer hold this judgment or injustice in my life for you and see yourself giving it back to them. This is very powerful and may help shift an energy that isn’t yours. Let me know if it helps. 💕


  2. I do agree with the previous comment that many judgements we bring with us are rooted in fear. Once I began to work on my fears, I was able to see clearer. With that said, I have learned that prior to making judgments or saying something to another person,I ask myself, am I hurting or am I helping? If my answer is anywhere close to hurting, even in a very small way, I don’t proceed. It’s such a simple question, that has great impact.


  3. Anita, yay! You did it. Congratulations on your first submission to ForgivingFridays. Your remarks about your experience with non-judgment are beautiful. I so honor your honesty and also your growing acceptance for people who are different than you.

    One thing I sensed as blooming in your post is a growing awareness that there isn’t right and wrong, only our thinking that makes it so. Rumi has a great quote, “Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” What if there truly is no right or wrong, and the only thing for us to do is choose love? ❤ It's a profound perspective and one that is so meaningful inside of me.

    I'm honored to share your post for this week's Forgiving Fridays. I also am starting an "Ask Forgiveness" post in the blog, where you can ask a question of forgiveness if you want to. Many blessings, Anita! Thanks again, and congrats on your upcoming book!

    Love, Debbie


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